“Now Isaac had come from Beer Lahai Roi, for he was living in the Negev. He went out to the field one evening to meditate, and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?”
“He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.
Then the servant told Isaac all he had done. Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.” (Genesis 24:62-67)
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I’ve been wondering for a long time about romantic love. Many experts say that it only lasts a few years and true love is much more than romance. It comprises of fidelity, dedication, commitment, and sacrifice.
I wonder what happened when Adam saw Eve – I mean, besides stating that she was “bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh”. Was it love at first sight? Were they nervous when they held hands for the first time? Did they get butterflies in their stomach? Did they tremble as they kissed for the first time? The Bible did not record anything of the sort – and it must be for a very good reason.
I tried to find love stories in the Bible. There are some, though not what I really expected to find. There was the story of Abram and Sarai. From what I read, Sarai was barren for a long time. Yet, Abram did not take a second wife until Sarai gave him Hagar. I take it as he loved her so much that he did not care she could not conceive for him. Also, he was a man of faith who believed in GOD’s promises – one of which was a child. Next, there was the story of Rebeccah and Isaac. Now, this one seems like love at first sight at least from Rebeccah’s side, if I dare to interpret freely. The Bible recorded that when she came, she saw Isaac walking in the prairie and after confirming who he was, she put on her veil. Virgins wore veils those days and my interpretation is she wanted to make sure Isaac knew she was eligible to be his wife. Later, the Bible recorded that Isaac took her to be his wife and loved her and was comforted after the loss of his mother. The story is incredible because GOD practically arranged the marriage. I don’t know any other story in the Bible where a similar thing happens. Next is of course the triangle of love of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah. I think that the story shows us that when GOD’s blue print for a family is modified by human intervention, things get pretty messy. The wives got jealous and envied each other. Later on, the eldest son slept with his father’s concubine. And, the children from the first wife hated their half brother. What a mess.
So much for the love stories. The bottom line is, I’m having a hard time now, trying to reconcile my understanding of what true love is all about, based on what I learned from the Bible, with what is happening in my life. I am struggling to reconcile my faith with the harsh reality of my love life and my weakness. Of course, you ought to seek companionship and not mere romance. Of course the most important thing in a man is his relationship with the LORD Jesus. I know all that. Yet, there’s a war inside my heart and my mind. And in my solitude, sometimes I break down. I do not know, yet, how to really move on from this love I’ve been in for almost two years now, because despite not consummated, the love stays rooted in my heart.
I’m just coping now. Perhaps, some day I can put it all behind me totally. Perhaps, it’s one of the stubborn things that just won’t go away. I don’t know. I just know that my stand is clear and it is with the LORD – even if it is sometimes painful.
